What makes a family? Immediately I picture my siblings and parents... my nephew. Then my mind wanders to cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents. A few years ago I went to a family reunion where I met distant relatives and I looked like many of them. The thought doesn't stop there with blood, though, it moves on to the family of God. My friends past and present whom God has perfectly placed in my life for each season. Beyond those friends there is family, too... the brothers and sisters in Christ we visited in Soshanguve. My family is made up of all these people and my love for each is unique, but love just the same.
The girls in Soshanguve we met kept calling me "sister." It was so cute. They call each other that all the time when addressing each other. What a beautiful thing. What if we walked around addressing our Christian brothers and sisters as such? Would people think it odd? When I think of the women in Soshanguve I think about how they refer to each other as family because they recognize that they need all the family they can get. Their needs are so great and without community...family... it is nearly impossible to meet them. Do we not have the same deep need? I think we do, but we are so careful not to let on too often that we're weak and in need.
This past weekend I spent a few days with my entire family in Madison, WI. We all met there from our corners of the country and took a look around where Becca & Eric have been living. The first few days I was overflowing with excitement, love and affection for my family. I couldn't get over that were all together in the same place and it just made me deeply happy. It didn't take long for satan to chime in and fill my heart with all kinds of resentments and frustrations with them, though. All their little quirks became blaring and I couldn't shake my feelings of annoyance. I returned to Boston feeling ashamed of myself and hurt. When I discussed it with friends I found that everyone has similar experiences when they're with family. I took comfort in their company... knowing exactly what I meant and agreeing that family can be the most wonderful and difficult thing as adults. Slowly, though, I've come to the realization that I don't want it to be like that. I can't accept that it has to be the most difficult, too. I hate that part, in fact. I hate that I can't just spend time with them and love them the way I love my friends... free of so many judgements and limitations.
What if I were dying and had nobody but my family... would I treat them the same way? The truth is that I am dying - we are all dying the moment we're born. The ability to cling to Truth escapes me so often. If I were faced with the life of my sisters in Soshanguve - what would my faith look like?? How would my life be different? better? worse? Why did God choose to place me in my family here in the States? I have no idea. I do trust, though, that He has a perfect will that deemed these things so. I believe that He will not leave these things undone and that, in fact, it is already done. In the Lord's Prayer it says, "Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven." Does that mean that God's Kingdom can come and His will can fully be done here?? now??
I am living so far from that truth at the present moment. I feel like I've been sipping some sin-exposure potion (can you tell I'm reading Harry Potter?) and now all I can see around me is the depravity of the world... of myself. It really is an awful place to be, but I know it can be used to open my eyes to Christ's love for me. Even with all these horrible and sinful ways --He died for me. and you. He even died for my attitude in Madison. He died for my brothers and sisters that share my last name and He died for my family outside the blood connection. Ultimately we are all blood related if it is Christ's blood that causes us to be brothers and sisters in Him.
It is hard to explain, but I have moments where these things make less sense to me and I just think the only way they would be clear is if my Mom were here to listen to me talk about them. That can't be true, but I'm not sure what it will take for that not to feel like truth. I miss her. I can't help but think how much she would have enjoyed seeing all of us together this past week. She most likely would have made me mad too, but she would have been there. Her absence was felt by everyone.
The families in Soshanguve live with loved ones missing everyday. In fact, according to statistics, every week 5,000 people die of HIV/AIDS in South Africa. Each week nearly 1500 are infected with the disease, so the cycle of death has no end. How do these children live their lives without family? Without parents? I sit in the sorrow of losing my Mom when I was 26 years old, but these children are lost at 6.
Family is vital. We were created to need community. We all have a piece within us that longs to be loved and accepted. Ultimately that piece was created by and for God to fill, but we spend our whole lives striving to fill it with someone or something else. We have a Heavenly Father who longs to meet all our needs and fill us with love and adoration. He loves us so intensely that He came to live among us in this fallen and broken world so that He could understand us and save us from eternal death. What a mighty Father.
The girls in Soshanguve we met kept calling me "sister." It was so cute. They call each other that all the time when addressing each other. What a beautiful thing. What if we walked around addressing our Christian brothers and sisters as such? Would people think it odd? When I think of the women in Soshanguve I think about how they refer to each other as family because they recognize that they need all the family they can get. Their needs are so great and without community...family... it is nearly impossible to meet them. Do we not have the same deep need? I think we do, but we are so careful not to let on too often that we're weak and in need.
This past weekend I spent a few days with my entire family in Madison, WI. We all met there from our corners of the country and took a look around where Becca & Eric have been living. The first few days I was overflowing with excitement, love and affection for my family. I couldn't get over that were all together in the same place and it just made me deeply happy. It didn't take long for satan to chime in and fill my heart with all kinds of resentments and frustrations with them, though. All their little quirks became blaring and I couldn't shake my feelings of annoyance. I returned to Boston feeling ashamed of myself and hurt. When I discussed it with friends I found that everyone has similar experiences when they're with family. I took comfort in their company... knowing exactly what I meant and agreeing that family can be the most wonderful and difficult thing as adults. Slowly, though, I've come to the realization that I don't want it to be like that. I can't accept that it has to be the most difficult, too. I hate that part, in fact. I hate that I can't just spend time with them and love them the way I love my friends... free of so many judgements and limitations.
What if I were dying and had nobody but my family... would I treat them the same way? The truth is that I am dying - we are all dying the moment we're born. The ability to cling to Truth escapes me so often. If I were faced with the life of my sisters in Soshanguve - what would my faith look like?? How would my life be different? better? worse? Why did God choose to place me in my family here in the States? I have no idea. I do trust, though, that He has a perfect will that deemed these things so. I believe that He will not leave these things undone and that, in fact, it is already done. In the Lord's Prayer it says, "Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven." Does that mean that God's Kingdom can come and His will can fully be done here?? now??
I am living so far from that truth at the present moment. I feel like I've been sipping some sin-exposure potion (can you tell I'm reading Harry Potter?) and now all I can see around me is the depravity of the world... of myself. It really is an awful place to be, but I know it can be used to open my eyes to Christ's love for me. Even with all these horrible and sinful ways --He died for me. and you. He even died for my attitude in Madison. He died for my brothers and sisters that share my last name and He died for my family outside the blood connection. Ultimately we are all blood related if it is Christ's blood that causes us to be brothers and sisters in Him.
It is hard to explain, but I have moments where these things make less sense to me and I just think the only way they would be clear is if my Mom were here to listen to me talk about them. That can't be true, but I'm not sure what it will take for that not to feel like truth. I miss her. I can't help but think how much she would have enjoyed seeing all of us together this past week. She most likely would have made me mad too, but she would have been there. Her absence was felt by everyone.
The families in Soshanguve live with loved ones missing everyday. In fact, according to statistics, every week 5,000 people die of HIV/AIDS in South Africa. Each week nearly 1500 are infected with the disease, so the cycle of death has no end. How do these children live their lives without family? Without parents? I sit in the sorrow of losing my Mom when I was 26 years old, but these children are lost at 6.
Family is vital. We were created to need community. We all have a piece within us that longs to be loved and accepted. Ultimately that piece was created by and for God to fill, but we spend our whole lives striving to fill it with someone or something else. We have a Heavenly Father who longs to meet all our needs and fill us with love and adoration. He loves us so intensely that He came to live among us in this fallen and broken world so that He could understand us and save us from eternal death. What a mighty Father.
1 comment:
Hey, great post. Yes we have a Father who does meet all our needs. And, thanks for the words of encouragemnt!
Blessings, kel
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