Catching up...

Please forgive my blogging negligence. It has been a month since I last wrote and so much has happened!

First of all, the Light the Night walk for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society of America was really nice. As you can see from this picture there were over a thousand people that came out to the Boston Common to honor and memorialize those who have and are currently fighting blood cancers. The white balloons are carried by survivors - you can see a lone one on the distance. The evening was nice. Kristen went with me and we completed the walk in roughly fifteen minutes. That's right- it wasn't actually a walk-walk... it was very plainly a fundraiser. The walk consisted of a single lap around Boston Common, so it wasn't really necessary for me to even be in sneakers. :) It was nice, though. They had stickers to wear that stated if you were walking in honor of or in memory of someone, so Kristen and I had Mom's name on ours. I put "Mom" under her name on mine and felt really happy to have it on. I can't explain it, but there are so many times I wish I could wear a t-shirt that says "My Mom died." That may sound crazy, but if you've lost someone this important to you it probably makes complete sense. There are just situations and people that I occasionally feel this spark to pull out my "grief card" and shut them up. The first time I shared this urge with someone they immediately warned me that I have no idea what kind of "cards" any of those people hold and would be better to keep mine to myself. ha! So true and I have never thrown it down in frustration. Grieving is tricky, I must say, there are certain rules to it that change depending on the situation and company you're keeping. I would like to think I'm typically on point with how I should be acting in any given situation, but that doesn't mean I don't have urges to act out. :)

Okay... on to the next thing. We went apple picking a week ago. It was beautiful weather and so nice to get out of the city for the day. There were about fifty people who showed up from our group and that felt really crazy and fun. I think people had a nice time and I certainly had fun. I got to pick with Elizabeth B, Jenny T, Tyler & The Standridges. Couldn't have asked for a better group. Jenny T, of course, makes life so much more fun... I wish she was around more.

This weekend was the highlight of my fall! Sister Sarah came to Boston! It was a spur of the moment type trip and I couldn't have been more excited to have her here. She came Thursday night and left this morning. It was the first time in nearly two years that I have not felt like I would could curl up in a ball and sob when I've left her. Our relationship is definitely at a high point and I think this weekend was just what we needed, both of us. Jake was in Texas on his cub scout campout with Papa and Uncle Adam, so it was girls only. :) We did a lot of North Shore driving and sight seeing which was really nice with all the trees changing. It was just good. So good. She also got to chat with some of my best friends here which I loved. We went to see Kelly and the kiddos on Friday, met some peeps from church, hung out with the roomies and went to NH to see my pal Melissa. It was perfect.

I've officially accepted the fact that I will not be going home for Thanksgiving. I'm pretty sure I'll still be sad when it arrives and I'm here, but I think I've at least got something to be happy about. 1. Sarah came here, so I got a little Snyder fix and 2. Four days off in a row with no travel and nothing planned. I can let that be enough for this year. I'm still not certain where I'll spend the day or with whom, I should say, but have had a couple offers. People are really nice here. Unbelievably nice. God is really good.

Speaking of the holidays... I wonder if my not focusing on them is a good thing because we're supposed to live for the day OR if it will come crashing down on me because I wasn't prepared at all... thoughts? I guess there's no formula or perfect way, but I can honestly say that if I even consider a second Christmas without my Mom it makes me a little sick to my stomach. Somehow there's still this part of me that can't believe it's true. Can't believe she's really gone.

I'll end on a couple lighter notes ;)

1. The Red Sox are playing their hearts out right now trying to win a spot in the World Series. This is serious business in Boston, but as you can see by what I'm doing while the game is on- I'm not that wrapped up in it. I support them and love that they're doing well, but I can't for the life of me get into sports. Someone asked me if I thought I ever would and the only way I could image it is if being married depended on it. ha! I would watch sports for my husband, but not voluntarily. :)
***EDIT*** The Sox won! They're headed to the World Series! It's pretty exciting to be living here right now. :) Go SOX!

2. I cut my hair off again. Yes, this was somewhat impulsive which has led to many hours of frustration and anger at myself, but overall I know it's fine. I had it cut the same last year and I know that I like the cut, but my hair is GONE. It had gotten pretty full and long... sigh... everyone keeps saying how great it looks, which is nice, but I think I still need another day or two. Cutting your hair is something you should definitely NOT do when you're stressed, hormonal, tired or preoccupied with something else. Hence the frustration with myself. :) But, alas, it is just hair and thankfully God blessed me with a long lineage of full headed hair so it will return in no time.

I hope you are all well. I will try to write more frequently! I promise. :)